Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Exhibit A

Today I had to go to Idaho Falls.

It's a long story, but basically I needed to buy some things for Sylas' birthday cake that were not available in my town.

So it was just Sy and I, shopping. All day.

He was a good sport. No, he was a great sport. But after a couple hours, I could tell his smiles were forced, and his end of the conversation sounded strained-civil.

Pie was in order.

And, since I have a crush on pie, I was thrilled to try a-restaurant-that-ends-with-Pies' daily special, Peaches and Cream.

MMMMMmmmmm. It was like my favorite fruit and my favorite dessert had a baby together.

In my mind it was a gourmet festival of fresh, tree-ripened peaches smothered in some sort of creamy cream filling.

In my mind, a place called a-restaurant-that-ends-with-Pies knows how to make pie.

A place with 'Pie' in its name (aside from that traitor, The Pie Hole, which I have mentioned before on this blog) obviously has pies whooped.

And they have crust they lovingly rolled out this morning, sprinkled with sugar and cinnamon, dowsed in cream, and baked until golden and flaky.

And they would never stoop to opening a can of filling. Or reddi-wip (sick. it doesn't have the words 'cream' or even 'whip' in it. what is it? if you google the non-word 'wip', you will get 'an acronym for work in progress', so how can it be both 'reddi' (?) and 'in progress'? any topping that is that confusing should be avoided. words to live by).

In my mind.

Unfortunately, this restaurant-that-ends-with-Pies is in Idaho Falls. Not in my mind.

And I do declare, before my blog, the Internet, and my country:

I can make a pie that is at least 200% better than that restaurant's!

With one and a half arms tied behind my back.

I am beginning to wonder if maybe people who have never had a good, home-made pie believe that grocery store freezer-section pies are where it's at, and so enjoy daily specials called, 'Peaches and Cream' (I think I'll make a suggestion to the manager that it be renamed, 'Peechez and Kreem')...?

And conclude that this must be the reason more people aren't as passionate about pie as I am?

Oh, how much they miss!

Disclaimer: I do not profess to be an expert in pie-baking. In fact, I hold the Guiness Book of World Records record for consistently ugly(est) pies. I submit for your consideration, Exhibit A. That said, don't judge a pie by its looks. Unless it looks like there is reddi-wip on top.


Sharlee said...

Ha ha... Peechez and Kreem. That gives it the credit it deserves. And a piece of pie is not cheap even if it tastes that way. Bummer.

Kimi Lou said...

Too funny, Drea! You kill me! AND you really ARE the pie queen you claim NOT to be! I don't know anyone who has as big a crush on pie as you or who makes one half so often! Good for you! (Do you always make your own crust? Just curious 'cause that's the only reason I never make pie.)