Friday, April 27, 2012

Budget Bangs

Creepy-Eye Pose Sold Separately 

*I am publishing past, forgotten-about drafts. This one is from last summer.

I know a lot of young girls out there are currently struggling with the age-old question:

Should I cut bangs?

It is a very real concern.

A decision with lasting consequences.

It's right up there with deciding who to marry.

Cause, let's face it, if you make the wrong choice and look homely, who's going to want to marry you?

See? This is serious.

Which is why I am going to go ahead and help you out here. Just this once.

I'll help you find a happy medium; A way to gradually, almost imperceptibly crop your bangs; A way to test the waters without the plunge. For free.

Here is my secret:

crappy sunglasses.

Yep. It sounds too good to be true, but it's not (good or true).

Here's how it works:

Every time you wear your crappy sunglasses, the corner next to where you tuck your long locks to the side will, if they are crappy enough, snag a hair or two.

Then, when you take off your sunglasses, voila!

A few broken strands.

Repeat. Repeat. Swear you'll buy new sunglasses (but don't, because you're thrifty)....and repeat.

That's right, girls. That's it! By the end of the summer you will have bangs!

Is it painful? Yes!

Is it worth it? No.

But 1 out of 2 ain't half bad.


Sharlee said...

I've been wondering what to do about my bangs/lack of them. Thanks for the tip!

Anonymous said...

Eh. . .hair is just dead skin cells. What you cut (or the glasses rip) will grow back. I hate hair - it's gross. If it was socially acceptable I would shave my head.