Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Recent Thoughts on Chocolate: An Outline

#1. I hesitate to say this out loud, but I do believe that my testimony of chocolate has been shaken. This is something I never imagined could happen, and the surprise is a little overwhelming. Am I still allowed to be me when such a fundamental facet of my existence has been so drastically skewed?
a. I still crave chocolate. It is cruel, really. I crave it out of habit. I dream about it. But then, when I put it in my mouth, it is sickeningly sweet and deeply disappointing.
b. I would rather have lemon bars than chocolate. And I just whisper-wrote that, because it feels like blasphemy. Until I remember: Oh, yeah. Chocolate isn't as awesome as I thought it was!
c. I still reach for chocolate. Again, out of habit. For instance, I am eating the peanut M&Ms my children gave me for Mother's Day WHILE I write this post, and I don't like them. But I keep eating them.
d. I am worried that this will alienate me (even more - who woulda' thought that was possible?) from other women. Especially the ones at the park who all gather 'round and chit-chat while I sit. By myself. Reading a book. I'm not the friendliest.
e. I used to have a saying that went like, "People who don't like chocolate can't be trusted." Now I feel the need to repent. And apologize.
f. I still like chocolate. I mean, it's not as if it makes me gag or anything! But I believe more and more every day, that I only like it out of habit. And maybe just a little out of because it's good. Just not as good as it used to be.
g. Am I going through "The Change of Life" or something? Is that what the "change" is?



3 comments:

The United Statements of Merica said...

Oh man I wish I were you.. although I am losing my taste for cheap chocolate. I don't like candy bars anymore. If I'm going to eat chocolate, it needs to be rich and usually expensive, so I don't eat it as much. When you come to visit me we will do 3 chocolatey things.

1. Dark chocolate fondue (bananas, strawberries, marshmallows, coconut cookies, etc.)
2. Republic of cake (best chocolate cupcake on the planet.. and other unique and tasty flavors if you're not so much in the chocolate mood.)
3. Cheesecake factory chocolate tuxedo cheesecake.. or any one of like 100 flavors.

Stephanie said...

I'm eating chocolate mint ice cream with milk chocolate melted on top. But a lemon bar does sound good (so long as it's warm and just the teensiest bit gooey).

Michelle said...

I am whisper writing, right now! (with an exclamation point - because that makes sense)