Saturday, July 21, 2012

Me, me, me, me, me, me, ME

What's the deal with the recent resurrection of those get-to-know-me lists? Is it because Blogger's been around long enough now that it's a sort of retro fad? Well, I'm much too cool for that, so instead I am  going to put together a list of random word-stream-type info-bits. In fact, I think I might do it every day for a while until I tire of it. Not in the (highly unlikely, but very justifiable) name of posterity's sake (seriously, I doubt my kids or anyone else will be enriched by knowing what animal I would be - if I were one, which I'm not - and why), but just because I like to talk about myself.

Just calling it what it is.

#1. It's my birthday week. It's been my birthday month for 21 days now, but this is the actual birthday WEEK. So that's super duper exciting.
#2. After an exhausting day at Bear Lake (you know the kind, right: sunburns, a trail of sand from the beach to the bathtub, sand castles in the car, dirty coolers, 23 loads of laundry needing washed, too tired to remember to brush your teeth before you fall into know), I basked in the glow of a day at the beach and realized that I am in love with that place. I have seen my fair share of lakes. I have even spent a few days on the beaches of the Pacific Ocean. And I declare that Bear Lake is better than them all! There. I said it. And that makes it so.
#3. I am not a water person. Neither is my husband. You know that saying, "If you're born to hang, you'll never drown"? Well, switch that, and you'll have us in a nutshell. We both feel strongly that we were born to drown. On the upside, at least we don't have to worry about being hanged. Whew! That's a huge relief!
#4. If I am not a water person, and I love Bear Lake, then what does that tell you? Yep, Bear Lake is most likely the Celestial Kingdom.
#5. I never go into the water past my upper thighs. Well, never is a long time, so I guess 'seldom' (as in I can count on one hand how many times I have been fully immersed in the last 10 years) would be more accurate.
#6. Remember how I used to be on a synchronized swimming team when I was 11? I'm sure I've mentioned it somewhere on this blog. Or maybe I'm thinking of my scrapbook. At any rate, it is shameful that I was practically an Olympic swimmer, and my kids have never seen me go under the water.
#7. Sometimes (allthetimes) I worry that someone will read something on here and not "get" it. Like,  see how I said I was practically an Olympic swimmer? But there's no way to know whether or not I'm serious (unless you have ever seen me, I guess)? Especially since no one (okay, one: Emily, you out there?) was there to witness what I am sure was some pretty hilarious-for-onlookers-had-there-been-any stuff. I do that a lot. Not the synchronized swimming, the putting of jokes in my writing than only I get. Then I worry no one else will get it. Why do I torture myself? Luckily, I am pretty sure no one reads this junk.
#8. I think that #7 just guaranteed that if anyone was reading this junk, no one is now. Which is fine, because it means that I can talk about running: a subject no one wants to hear about ever...
#9. I ran in my first race today. It was a "fun run." They didn't time us, and my running app had a malfunction, and so I have absolutely no idea how I did. Which is pretty much just my luck. Because the only reason I ran it was to see how fast I can run if I really try. And to think I could have slept in with the same results!
#10. I didn't know a soul at the race. It was really awkward. Now I know why people run in packs.
#11. My brain has not been working for a few months, which is why I haven't posted, and which is also why I can't think of any more "interesting" tidbits to share, and which is also why I have just been unknowingly staring at my computer screen for whoknowshowlong. But everything in me rebels against a list of 10, and so I had to make a #11. I am such a rebel.
#12. Oh, I just thought of a #12! For the past three days, my kids' hair, my hands, and my vacuum smell like throw up to me. Do I have another brain tumor do you think (I should stop joking about it, huh? But I'm not going to)? And I watched a girl throw up at the fairgrounds today while I was manning an Italian Sandwich booth. That, combined with the heat and my migraine made me almost lose my own precious cookies. Sick. There should be a sign at the fairgrounds that says, "No Throwing Up By the Food Booths!"

There. I think that is a pretty decent list of worthless information.

And a good kick-off for Birthday Week 2012.


vanessa said...

lolz...i totally caught the olympic joke. it was subtle, but I was paying really close attention and giggled after you mentioned it.

vanessa said...

ps. you should probably get an MRI.

Raquel said...

Honey, your maiden name is Orton, so there are at (the very) least 100 people (plus Vanessa!)who're going to get your humor. And appreciate it.

So glad you're posting again! And happy birth month!!

Emily said...

Wait, I don't get it. Are you saying we weren't practically Olympic swimmers? When I watch the Olympics, I know in my heart that I could be one of those girls with the waterproof mascara defying the laws of flotation and water displacement. Don't sell yourself short Andrea. We were hot stuff.

Anonymous said...

Oh Andrea, you bring joy to my heart!

Kimi Lou said...

I always "get" your jokes! (I think)
I love Bear Lake too, but don't want to take any children with me when I go.
Congrats on your first race! (Who ever put the words "fun" and "run" in the same sentence?) Want to do it again in Sept?
I was always jealous of your syncronized swimming days! You always were the athlete!
I love you.